Comedy, Elaboration, and STAAR Test Prep

Facebook counts as professional development. Right? I was scrolling through the other night and this video of Roy Wood Jr. performing on Jimmy Fallen comes up. I give it a listen. I'd been working with some students about their expository and persuasive essays. They were having a hard time with elaboration and development of ideas. The teacher employed a pretty common strategy - use a personal example, give an example from history, or include something from a book or movie. Well, the kids did that. They even wrote them down on their prewrting graphic organizers.  On the drafts, it lasted about one sentence.  Didn't quite count as a fully developed reason, point, paragraph, whatever. Just turned into a list. But Roy Wood? Look what he does to develop his ideas for this comedy routine. Oh, he gives a personal example and examples from the news... but what he does inside those examples shows the true genius of elaboration and explanation. 

Funny stuff. Part of what makes it funny is the organizational strategy of comparison and contrast. Part of what makes it funny is the call back to the implied racism of cops at the end. (Not that racism is funny. At all. But call back and framing are good strategies for conclusions.) And part of what makes it funny is all the details he adds. Can you name all the moves this comedic genius makes to develop his ideas within the examples? (I took his text from the closed captions on YouTube and added paragraphing, some punctuation, and a tagline.) 

I have a child. I have a child:he's two, and I love him, but I have now found out that the feeling is not mutual. Took this boy to a fire station. He run off; start kicking it with all the firefighters. I get it now; I get why cops don't like firefighters. They got all this charisma, firefighters. They got all this charisma. And there's nothing you can do to stop it. This is how much we love firefighters.

Firefighters get the same amount of hero love as cops, but none of the scrutiny. No sign of -- you've never looked at a firefighter and wondered if he's one of the good ones. It's never happened. Hey…you want to be a good cop? You got to hand out free ice cream. You got to go to the hood and dance with children. You want to be a good firefighter, all you got to do is take your shirt off and make a calendar. That's it. You win the game. You can't be cooler than a firefighter.

Only person cooler than a firefighter is a forest firefighter. That's next level, 'cause they ain't got no equipment. They just out in the woods with a chainsaw and a shovel. That's all they have. A chainsaw and a shovel, chopping trees -- It's basically CrossFit. That's what that job is. It's the X Games of firefighting. Like a forest fighter would say to a regular firefighter: “Oh, you like fighting fire? Well, can you do it without a truck or water?” And if that doesn't work, the only thing the forest firefighters have as backup is a helicopter flying overhead just drizzling something on top of the fire. And I'm sure --I'm sure it's doing something. I'm sure it's helping; but I'm watching from the house, and I see that helicopter with the bucket, and it drizzles. I'm like, “That didn't do anything at all. You need more helicopters.”  

Only person cooler than a forest firefighter is a volunteer firefighter.  That's the next level, 'cause they ain't getting no money. No money. To just fight fire on the side. They already have a job. They have a job; and then every now and then, "Hey, man, I'll be at work, but let me know if something burning. I'm happy to swing by."  Who you know run into a burning building as a side hustle? You've got to respect volunteer firefighters. Everybody loves volunteer firefighters. Yeah.

Nobody loves a volunteer police officer. In fact, there's nothing more scarier than a volunteer police -- Even the police don't trust a volunteer -- That's why they call them vigilantes. I have two cops in my family, and I know that one advantage that cops for sure have is that they get to do their job off duty.

Off-duty cops. Off-duty cops -- that's the only time you hear somebody's occupation inserted into a news story. You do something amazing, and it's one of us, we're just a regular -- you're just a good Samaritan. You ain't no off-duty accountant. But if you're a cop, and you're a cop when you didn't have to be a cop, you're now an off-duty cop. And it's always a superhero story from an off-duty -- "In other news today, an off-duty police officer, he pulled a school bus from a tornado by himself.The tornado has been taken into custody." Off-duty cops, 'cause cop is the only hero job that you can do without equipment. All you need to be a cop is courage.

You can be an off-duty firefighter. Absolutely. You can be an off-duty firefighter. Pull up to the fire. But if you do not have your equipment, you are just a person standing outside of a fire. You are a bystander. That is what you are right now. You are a bystander. You have no truck. You have no water. You at the wrong fire. You should be in the forest.

I get it. I get why these cops are jealous of firefighters, man. You got all this police reform going on. There hasn't been a single firefighter misconduct video. No firefighter misconduct. Plus, as a firefighter, it's got to be hard to be prejudiced as a firefighter. Half your job in the smoke: you can't see who you're saving. You don't know. If you a firefighter, you trying to be prejudiced, that means you got to pat around --you got to listen for race. You got to hear it.

You got to say -- "Fire Department, call out. Fire Department, you in here? Fire Department --"

"I'm over here, cuz. Save me, bruh."

"This floor is all clear, headed upstairs.”

Thank you to the first responders.

For more, go to roywoodjr.com, everybody.

You see, what I find is that teachers and test taking strategy suggestions are really good as suggesting shallow, formulaic responses to developing ideas. But when it comes down to it, list making really doesn't work. Roy's routine would NOT have been funny if he'd simply listed examples. 

Look back at that paragraph about the forest fighter. Let's NAME what he did as a comedic writer: 

• Only person cooler than a firefighter is a forest firefighter. - establishes a contrast
• That's next level - use of a colloquial reference to gaming to quantify the contrast
• 'cause they ain't got no equipment - gives a reason for the "cooler" contrast
• They just out in the woods with a chainsaw and a shovel - specifically labels the types of common equipment they have and names the setting
• That's all they have - emphasizes the insufficiency of the equipment
• A chainsaw and a shovel, chopping trees - provides imagery for the reader to visualize; specifically repeats the names of the tools
• It's basically CrossFit - gives a real world analogy that his audience would connect to of how strenuous this work is 
• That's what that job is. uses repetition, varies sentence length for emphasis
• It's the X Games of firefighting - uses another cultural real world reference to compare how strenuous the work is - and how "out there" these kind of firefighters are. 
• Like a forest fighter would say to a regular firefighter: sets up an imaginary dialogue
• Oh, you like fighting fire? Well, can you do it without a truck or water?” has the forest fighter issue a challenge with attitude and confidence;  and further describes the contrast of the firefighter and forest firefighter by specifically naming the tools the regular firefighter has 
• And if that doesn't work, the only thing the forest firefighters have as backup is a helicopter flying overhead just drizzling something on top of the fire. - sets up an example that the opposition might bring up as an opposition; uses a word like "drizzling" to minimize the effect on the fire
• And I'm sure --I'm sure it's doing something - concedes to the point; varies sentence length to emphasize his skepticism
• I'm sure it's helping - restatement
• but I'm watching from the house, and I see that helicopter with the bucket, and it drizzles - relates a personal experience and his opinion that it's not effective by repeating "drizzle" 
• I'm like, “that didn't do anything at all. - shares what he was thinking (reminds me of a Ba Da Bing) 
• You need more helicopters - helicopters aren't working - refutes the opposition

If we want kids to be able to elaborate, we must be able to NAME how one does that work. And we learn that by looking at how real writers and performers get that done. NOT by filling out a graphic organizer. 

BONUS: Try giving kids the transcript and having them add the punctuation. Make revisions and edits for sentence structure, delete lines that are irrelevant, add sensory details that suggest tone in the voice that the text doesn't convey without the performance, etc.